Disappointment

Disappointment, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

This is what disappointment looks like.

(Okay, okay. So I'm faking that facial expression.)

But I'm not faking my disappointment. Here's to tomorrow being better than today... which, I'm sure it will be. Because no matter what goes down tomorrow night, at least tomorrow morning I get to see my babies walk through Idewild's Story Book Forest. And there's no better pick-me-up than Gage yelling "Cuz Kah-wee" or Laken laughing. There's nothing I love more than holding Liam or watching Quinton run around with endless energy.

Those boys are my babies. They are my reason for smiling this weekend.

Even if I spend too much time dwelling on reasons to be sad and disappointed.

Content

Content, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Sometimes, I wish I was as content as my dog, Jasmine.

At least tomorrow's Friday. Not that I've had a long week or anything - because I haven't - but this weekend is promising to be even better than last weekend... and I'm just as hopeful.

I may not be where I thought I'd be, doing what I thought I'd be doing - but there are still plenty of reasons to be smiling right now.

So I'm just going to take some advice from Jasmine and soak it all in.

Late Nights

Late Nights, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Ever since my surgery, my sleeping schedule is completely screwed up.

Even as I sit here now, I can't fall asleep. And there was nothing else exciting to blog about today.... not that this is even remotely exciting.

Honestly, I've never felt so unmotivated.

Oh I Just LOVE Him!

Oh I Just LOVE Him!, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

When all else fails and you need a pick-me-up, spend some time with Aaron Menzer.

Tonight we hung out and got dessert at this place in Monongahela, before we headed out to the mall area. We shopped a bit at DSW and then watched an hour of Pirates of the Caribbean III at the cheapie-theater before we were too bored to sit there any longer. Then we just headed back to Aaron's house to hang with his family.

Honestly, I am really just... so lucky to have him home now, especially at such a confusing time in my life. I feel like I can be so open and honest and real with him in ways I can't be with a lot of the people in my life.

And sometimes, what a girl needs, is to just sit down at Lenzi's with a big piece of cake in front of her and let all of her ranting and confusion and happiness and sadness come spilling out until she feels better, even if at the end of the day, nothing has been solved.

Sometimes Cuz Kah-wee's Mean

Sometimes Cuz Kah-wee's Mean, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Today was a long, but ridiculously fun day.

I kept planning on leaving West Virginia, but didn't actually leave til 7:30 tonight. I played with the kids in the morning, went to lunch with my aunt in town (....and Amy, Laken and Liam, haha.) Then I babysat Laken & Liam this afternoon while Amy went to some teacher meeting at Quinton's school.

Later that afternoon, Quinton came home from his first day of school, Kelli brought Gage over and my aunt stopped by. We were all just hanging out at Amy's - a full house, complete with Jarion (Amy's husband, Laken/Liam's dad) actually home; he's in the military and usually away when I come to visit. The house was packed with kids and noise... and I couldn't stop smiling.

Especially once we put this one stupid toy on Liam's head. It made him cry, but it was just too damn funny to not photograph. (Yes, sometimes I'm the mean cousin, but for the most part they DO adore me.)

Then later tonight, I stopped by Kelli's a bit for some one-on-one time with Gage and Kelli before I left for PA. I really enjoy talking to my cousin... especially since I feel even closer to her now than I did when we were younger. And boy, did I idolize her when I was younger.

Kelli Jo told me tonight that she's really, really happy I'm able to come down so much, even if I'm not really happy with where I am at this point in my life. But you know something? All the precious moments I've experienced this summer with those kids are ones I'd never go back and give up -- even if it meant having my dream life in some other city.

In whatever time I have here, I'm going to do my best to make sure that those kids not only know who I am -- but just how much I love them.

Worth Every Cent of Gas

Worth Every Cent of Gas, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

After church with Cousin Holly this morning, I drove down to West Virginia to help my aunt "shuck corn" and bag it, so we could freeze it to have during the winter.

It took a few hours to make all of it, but it was well worth the effort since it tasted so good. I know I'll be happy I put in the time come winter.

BUT an added bonus to driving down to West Virginia is of course, my babies.

Tonight my aunt, cousin Amy and I took Quinton, Baby Laken and Baby Liam down to their friends' pool again to go swimming. It's always so much fun to swim with the kids... and its so good to see their friends, Phyllis and Harvey with them.

Kelli and her boyfriend Matt brought Gage over a little later. He came "galloping" into the pool area to see what was going on. Then he looked up and saw me, squealed "Cuz Kah-wee!" and ran over to give me a high-five and a kiss.

That moment alone was worth every single cent of gas I paid to get down there.

I was going to back to PA that night, but ended up sleeping over instead.

I'm telling you - those kids have stolen my heart.

And they lived happily.

And they lived happily., originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Today, I watched Summer 07 Wedding #3 unfold before my eyes.

Dana and Bob deserve all the happiness in the world... that I know. It was a great night filled with random high school friends I haven't seen in years and endless amounts of dancing. OH and cake. Lots of cake. :)

It was also my last night with LaLa before she heads back to school.

Funny to feel like so much is ending (this summer, my fun times with La), when all I can see is how much is just beginning for these two.

Next Scheduled Chicken Dance: To Be Determined

Beautiful Stranger

Beautiful Stranger, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

One warm, summer night
+
One empty baseball field
+
One dugout
+
One large jug of peach schnapps, vodka and orange juice
+
Deep conversation
+
An insane amount of laughing
+
Endless perfect moments
+
Two people who just click

=

Who knows.

But I'm reminded of my favorite post secret card ever:
"Beautiful stranger, I've dreamed of someone like you.
Someone who is so radiant with happiness that they are easy to love."

If Ya Wanna Be My Lovah (Take 2)

Girls Gone Wild, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Tonight, La, Regina and I took Dana out for one last run around the local Mon City bars before her wedding!

The first place we ended up was the Hot House, which is near our old high school. It was COMPLETELY EMPTY except for four wasted guys, one who went to high school with us. So it was the eight of us, two bartenders, and a huge book filled with songs for karaoke.

You can imagine the outcome.

Nothing like being with some of your best friends as you belt out, "If ya wanna be my lov-ah!" at the top of your lungs.

Tonight was SUCH a good night.

But summer's almost over & I'm not ready for the fall.

Gallbladder-lessly Happy

Gallbladder-lessly Happy, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

This is what excitement looks like after your surgeon says everything went perfectly with your surgery and your recovery is (almost) 100% complete!

It feels good to be social again.

Gallbladder, I'm not gonna miss ya one bit. No offense, but I still can't figure out why I needed you in the first place.

On a side note:
Lets talk about our lives,
Things we dont know about each other, our mysteries.
Get a look into your eyes.

Rain, Rain, Go Away

Rain, Rain, Go Away, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

The rain this week has been ridiculous. All I did all day was read.

Even Jasmine's bored.

Some Things in Life Cannot Be Staged

Some things never change., originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

You know, sometimes I get really excited about blog photos.

I semi-plan them out as things are happening. I yell, "OHMYGODBLOGPHOTO!" really loudly. I take pictures friends and family really don't want me to take - because sometimes we happen to be in public when I want to take them. You know, I love my blog. But I think -sometimes- I embarrass my friends with it.

Tonight on my first BIG NIGHT OUT to Eat N Park with LaLa after the big gallbladder surgery, I am pumped. I'm going to a place to EAT. I'm going to sit with a FRIEND thats not RELATED to me in public. It was just going to be great!

Soooo... We have a lovely dinner. And then it was time for dessert... the Eat N Park Summer Special Hershey's Kissables Sundae. I tried to get it TWO WEEKS AGO, but they were out of kissables and I couldn't. Ever since, I've YEARRRRRRNED for that kissable sundae. Dreamed of it. Tasted it in my sleep. I think I mumbled "kissables" during my surgery... though I'm not sure.

And of course, when I got it tonight, I thought it would be the highlight of the evening. The way to document the day. A picture of me FINALLY with the sundae that matches whats on the menu. A picture of me thumbs-upping the sundae! ...THUMBS-UPPING LIFE!

Here I am world! I'm back! I'm at Eat N Park! I put on MAKEUP!

But just as my dreams of a perfect blog photo begin to fabricate, I go to make a phone call. Just as I reach for the phone, I happen to knock over the first full glass of water I've had since the beginning of our meal... and let's just say that was a long, long, LONG time ago.

This full glass of water tips and empties itself all over me.

Ice. cold. Eat N Park water.
All over my thin, cotton, capris.

LaLa is laughing.
The waitress is laughing.
The people a booth over are laughing.

I am so soaked and so dumbfounded that before I know it - we're at NetNet's shop down the street showing her how RIDICULOUS I look. Then she makes me take off my pants and put on a robe while she dries my soaked capris in the dryer.

And all of a sudden... I have another photo to document my day.

Because I no longer remember the taste of the sundae.

HELLO, WORLD! I'm BACK!

HELLO, WORLD! I'm BACK!, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

This is what Mecca looks like to those who've been trapped in the Shaffer house for six days straight.

Me: Okay, I'm ready to go.
My Sister: (looks at me in my sweatpants, tank and ponytail) You realize we're going out in public, right? Like - people will actually see you dressed like that?
Me: Yeah. Right. Who's going to see me at Hollywood Video?

(roughly twenty minutes later at the store)
Voice from Behind: Oh my god! Kari S******! I thought that was you!
My Sister: I told you not to dress like that.

Apparently friends I haven't seen in two years were also making the pilgrimage to my Mecca this afternoon. ...Shit!

Friends are fun.

Friends are Fun, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

And sometimes, on horribly, miserably, sick and gross days - they visit you. And bring you presents. Or sometimes, since they can't visit you, they send presents through the mail.

They may just be cards and magazines and earrings, but they were the highlight of my week.

Thanks, girls.

Introducing, my two new best friends:

Hello. Meet my two new best friends., originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

The Living Room Couch & the Family Room Couch.

Where I have spent pretty much every waking and sleeping moment of my days since the surgery. I can't even sleep in my own bed, because its too uncomfortable for my side and I can't get in and out of it very easily.

(pause)

This whole post-surgery thing makes for very boring blogging.

I'm sorry.

The Gallbladder Weight Loss Plan = Ineffective

Bruised, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Elisa: So, surgery is really no excuse to get behind on the blog....
Elisa: Belly pictures!! stitches!!

Well. I'm finally able to sit up for a decent amount of time to blog.

And who am I to deny my fans the view of my six-pack? If only I had one.

Instead, I have this. Which doesn't look like much. (Well... look like a big deal PAIN wise.... I'm aware theres a lot of chub, thanks!) But it's amazing how something so insignificant can hurt so much.

In other news, my gallbladder didn't weigh 25 pounds as I had been hoping. Damnit. I guess I'm actually going to have to get back on my diet if I want to lose more weight. Sigh. I wonder how much kidneys weigh?

Wristbands

Wristbands, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Hospital wristbands are not as much fun as Kennywood wristbands, which I'd much rather be wearing today.

All I've done recently is sleep. If I'm not sleeping, I'm in too much pain. Which makes me take pills. Those pills make me sleep. I wake up... in pain. I take pills. I sleep. And the circle continues.

Again, I'd much rather be at Kennywood.

Take a Number, Please

Take a Number, Please, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

And my morning began...

5:00: I take a number & check in. I'm the first surgery of the day.
5:30: I'm naked in a changing room, putting on my hospital gown.
6:00: I'm in my hospital bed, getting IV-ed up. "You can go ahead and scream if you want, I won't care," the nurse tells me. I think she was trying to be funny. I don't like needles. I didn't find it funny.
6:30: Um. I'm waiting. In bed. Next to my mom, who is taking this time to show me her new Reading book for her 3rd grade classroom. If I wasn't trapped to the bed, I'd probably have left the room by now.
7:10: My surgeon comes in. "I kept telling people all vacation that they wouldn't BELIEVE how full this girls gallbladder is! I just kept laughing! I'm still laughing! Lets get this sucker out, girl," she says.
7:30ish: The last thing I remember is them moving me from my stretcher to the operating table. I tried to look for McDreamy before I passed out... but was unsuccessful. No McSteamy either.


...Everything after that was a blur. At one point my surgeon came back in to my recovery area to tell me my gallbladder was fuller than she even expected. (She was still laughing.) But she said everything was taken out okay and although I was sore - I should feel a ton better by this time next week. Then at some point my mom came back. At some point I was moved into a chair. Then they made me eat two crackers. I'm sure a bunch of other things happened, but I don't really remember much.

I left the hospital around 3 p.m. Later that night I began screaming like a maniac because my mom didn't want to give me another of my Percocet pills. It had only been five hours, rather than the recommended six.

I can see why people don't like dealing with drug addicts or pregnant women. There's something about being in so much pain and KNOWING you have access to pills you aren't being given that just make you completely psycho.

I ended up throwing such a fit that she had to call my doctor to see if it was okay to give me the pill early.

(Of course) it was. And I've never enjoyed a victory more.

Spring & Summer, Every Other Day

Spring & Summer, Every Other Day, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Summer has flown by a little too quickly.
I'm not ready for it to be mid-August yet.

I'm also not ready for my surgery tomorrow. I'm finally starting to get nervous -- not necessarily about the surgery itself but everything that happens after the surgery.

The recovery.
The lack of job.
The friends leaving.

Even when you aren't in school anymore, I guess its always sad to see summer go.

Girls Become Lovers, Who Turn into Mothers

Girls Become Lovers, Who Turn into Mothers, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

In case you were wondering, its completely impossible to get all Shaffer granddaughters and their children looking at the camera at the exact same time.

Today, we had a huge family dinner up at Glisan's Restaurant in Farmington, PA to celebrate my college graduation and my sister's graduation from beauty school.

Both sides of the family were present -- and most family members actually made it. We had 25 people there total, which is insane for our family. All of the Smith granddaughters were there, as well as all of the Shaffer granddaughters, except for Tammy who lives in Georgia. We joked we'd just photo-shop her in later.

It was so nice to have so much family so close together. We probably won't have both sides of the family together again until either Lauren or I get married... but you know, it's true, you learn to appreciate your family a lot more as you get older.

I've always loved my cousins, but now I realize just how much.

Then again, it might have something to do with their babies.
Who knows. ;o)

Release

Release, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

In order to put some weeks behind you, you just have to throw back some shots. (Buttery nipples to be exact.)

Luckily, there was a birthday girl around to help me out.

Happy 21st Birthday, Lindy!
The drinks/dancing were much needed.

"Hey - We're closed."

Hey - we're closed., originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Last day at Victor Global.

Will we be missed?
I'm pretty sure all signs point to yes.

There is No Future, There is No Past.

There is No Future, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

"There is no future, there is no past.
Thank God this moment's not the last.
There's only us, there's only this.
Forget regret. Or life is yours to miss." ~RENT

Go figure. I wasn't able to sleep at all last night because of sharp pains from my gallbladder and so I called off from my next-to-last day of work. Then when I woke up and got on Facebook to check my horoscope of the day (figured I was feeling so crappy - maybe a happy outlook would be nice) -- this is what I see.

Whats that? No horoscope listed for VIRGO?

Yes, there was one for every other sign, except Virgo. And then when I logged on later in the day, it was back to the same one as the day before. Not that I take them that seriously - but come on, cut me a break here.

Facebook, at least FAKE a positive outlook for me when my last day of work is tomorrow AND I have surgery next week. Give me some hope, here.

....And don't even get me started on the dream I had today where I met Usher but he wouldn't take a picture with me cause he "doesn't take photos with fans between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m." Even my dreams suck right now.

Meeting Chloe

Meeting Chloe, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

I met my coworker Tanya's daughter Chloe today for the first time.

I have been hearing stories about Chloe since I started at the office back in May. And I've heard the guys in the office teasing Tanya about her... pretty much since I started back in May. But she is hands down one of the most adorable little girls ever. I'm convinced she should marry Baby Gage.

However, Chloe got extremely giggly when she saw her boyfriend, Jacob, walk into CiCi's Pizza too. This was her being REALLY excited when she could see him across the room... I wish I had a picture of how sad she looked when he left. I think she might just be in love. However, Jacob is 14 so I don't know how interested he is in her and we all know how much it hurts to be rejected by men. At least she's learning early!

Anyway, La and I had an awfully boring day at work ... which I am hating more and more with each passing day. And by hate, I mean loathe. But again, there are some pretty fantastic people that I have met because of it that building.

Which sort of makes me sad that my last day at work is Friday.
...Oh wait, what? Friday?

Yes. I said Friday.

My life just got even more confusing even faster than I thought possible.

Typical Ellen Situation (Chapter Two)

Typical Ellen Situation (Chapter Two), originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Just as Ellen described my parents perfectly... she also fully understood the frustrations of starting a new roll of toilet paper.

You know though, sometimes when I start to feel guilty about how much paper Victor Global seems to waste every day, I remember how much toilet paper I've destroyed in my lifetime.

False Advertising

Friends are Fabulous, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

I would have appeared in this photo with my friends, smiling away, if only Eat N Park hadn't lured me into their establishment with the hopes of getting a bowl of their new Hershey's Kissables Sundae... only to tell me they are out of kissables, therefore can't make the sundae.

I was heartbroken. I think even the waitress felt bad when she saw my face.

La: PLEASE. Just go to the gas station and get a bag of Kissables, then bring it back here to give the waitress. PLEASE! IT WOULD BE SO FUNNY!

I think my friends secretly hate me.

An Early Awakening

Sisterly Adoration, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

"And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6

This morning, I dragged my extremely exhausted self out of bed and went to church for the second Sunday in a row with my sister.

I really haven't made the effort to go to church in recent years, somewhat because of school and work. But a lot of it also had to do with the fact that a lot of churches seem to be focusing more on hate and intolerance rather than love and acceptance. Its why I originally loved the church I went to freshman year in Tucson, and then it is also why I stopped going.

Its just... the foundations of 'the church's' message changed when the old pastors were rotated out and the new one was rotated in. AGAIN, this is just another example of how its not the true message that pushes many away, but rather its those 'examples of Christ' who often twist around the words in the Bible for their own political agenda. Hate is hate, no matter how you look at it and no matter who you say is supporting your hate. God doesn't support anyone's hate. Plus, if you spend too much of your energy trying to keep other people down, you will have none left to raise them up. And that is what faith is supposed to be about -- unconditional love and finding faith in those when no one else sees it.

Today, Lauren and I met our cousins Holly & Heather at the Methodist Church Holly got married in back in June, where they also currently attend. The pastor that married Holly (who I really like and usually just preaches at the Sunday evening service) actually spoke this morning, which was good. And I can honestly say its the first time I've really enjoyed church in a long, long time. I wouldn't even mind going to church on Sunday evenings if it was to hear him speak. That pastor and I had even had some really interesting conversations at the rehearsal for Holly's wedding about how churches spend too much time pushing people away, rather than embracing them, so I really value his message and tried to pay attention more. He's one of those pastors I truly believe does this work for God and the love of man, rather than himself.

Afterwards, the cousins, Lauren and I all went to lunch... and it was nice. Really, really nice. Its also the second Sunday in a row that my sister and I have spent more than an hour together and not fought... which is incredibly unusual anymore.

Who knows. Maybe my cousins, sister and I will end up there next week.

Where Mah Gurlz 'At

Where Mah Gurlz 'At, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

Tonight was (Summer '07 Bride #3) Dana's bachelorette party.

It was just so Dana, with an evening filled with alcohol, funny penis games, great food, dancing and laughter at a small bar in Monongahela. There were about 10 of us total, not including Dana's last chance for a BAR ROMANCE who kept stumbling into our private bachelorette party area.

Luckily, I am happy to report, Dana really does love Bob (and her dignity... because that drunk guy was definitely something else... in a bad way.)

I may have finally been taught the Electric Slide (which I have butchered at way too many weddings not just this summer, but summers past.) However, I was drunk at the time so we'll see how much I remember!

And YES. That IS Joe Montana behind us in the picture. Haha.

Cause All Work and No Play...

Cause All Work and No Play..., originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

The past couple days at work have been more about annoying the crap out of Brian (he loves us) than doing any actual real work.

Now this Brian isn't to be confused with the Bryan upstairs who just got married. This Brian downstairs at the office is MUCH, MUCH older (the month he started college was the month I was BORN!) and the Bryan upstairs actually.... works.

For several weeks now, La and Brian have been at war. Every time La passes his office, she tries to hit him with rubber bands before he hits her. Sometimes, I think he just sits there all day waiting for her to walk past on her way to the kitchen. You know. Since he doesn't actually work.

Today they were in the middle of an all out war right before they heard one of the owners of the company start to come down the steps. All fire then ceased. But I have a feeling that the closer and closer we get to La leaving next week, the more and more entertaining work will become...

And the older and older Brian will age. ;) Even though he has myspace and tries to remain cool and hip.

Me: (to Brian, after I found him -- and his REAL age -- on myspace today at work) "You are freaking 41? Holy crap are you old... ;) Haha You could be in that movie. You know. With Steve Carell... the 40 Year Old... Oh wait. That's right. You're even too old to star in THAT movie."

Love, Dad

Love, Dad, originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

No, my parents aren't going out of town.

Yes they are still leaving notes to remind me of things.

Fantastic.

Fantastic., originally uploaded by reasonenoughtocelebrate.

So, I hadn't really mentioned in here that ever since spring break I've had really sharp pains under my right rib every so often... especially at night. One night it was so bad I even woke up my parents because I was crying from the pain and couldn't stop myself from throwing up.

Finally, after getting the pains again in West Virginia, I went to the doctor (last Tuesday), who sent me to get an ultrasound (last Thurday), who sent me to a surgeon (today.)

Surgeon: Wait, your doctor didn't tell you about your results yet?
Me: ....No.
Surgeon: Uhhh... (grabs folder and results really quick.) To directly quote, 'Gallbladder is almost COMPLETELY filled with gallstones. Must be removed immediately.' So we need to do this soon. (pauses) I can't BELIEVE no one's told you yet! Thats just crazy! I also don't see how you didn't come in sooner.

So yeah. August 14th. I get to have my first surgery when I have my gallbladder removed. You know, nothing like your body falling apart WEEKS before you lose your parents' insurance coverage!